By Joan Lachkar
Marriage and couple therapists see consumers with damaged relationships and bonds forever; those that have been as soon as head over heels in love can develop detached, humans switch, and move into classes feeling depressed, traumatized, and infrequently abused through their companions. Joan Lachkar examines the vicissitudes of affection relatives by means of bearing in mind elements of aggression, cruelty, sadism, envy, and different primitive defenses lurking within the shadows of affection and intimacy. each one bankruptcy revolves round a selected situational clash, with instructions and remedy feedback provided to the therapist. a variety of vignettes and precise descriptions of theoretical approach, technique, and diagnostic differences are incorporated during the booklet to assist readers see thought in motion. The theoretical strategies drawn on comprise psychoanalysis, item family members, self-psychology, attachment idea, DBT, mindfulness, and others, with a heavy emphasis on listening and non-verbal and verbal conversation all through.
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Extra resources for Common Complaints in Couple Therapy: New Approaches to Treating Marital Conflict
The most common reasons for an affair are the following: • The person falls madly in love with someone else. • The person feels something is missing in the relationship. • The person acts out of revenge or as an expression of anger. 14 Complaints and the Art of Listening • The person needs many different people for adulation and attention. • The person is perverted and looks for excitement in lieu of love. • The person has lost contact with his/her inner passion and turns to excitement as a superficial substitute.
I still owe him for a loan he gave us years ago. Besides, he’s supporting my alcoholic brother. Therapist: Would it help not to repay him now, to buy some extra time? Mrs. D: No, I can’t do that. I have to pay him back. Therapist: Yet, your dad can afford to wait. He has lots of properties, investments, and gives tons of money to your other siblings. Mrs. D: But I feel so guilty. Therapist: Guilty? Mrs. D: When I was young I had terrible grades, smashed up two cars, and caused my parents a lot of problems.
In Aggression in Personality Disorders and Perversions (1992), Kernberg describes four kinds of love relationships: (1) normal, (2) pathological, (3) perverse, and (4) mature love. His premise is that in normal love the relationship overcomes the conflict. Internal strivings do not interfere with the capacity to maintain an intimate, loving connection. In pathological love, conflict overpowers the relationship, and internal conflicts do interfere with the capacity to maintain a loving relationship.
Common Complaints in Couple Therapy: New Approaches to Treating Marital Conflict by Joan Lachkar